Moved from Florida to Pennsylvania
August 15
Moved to a new home in PA. It's so beautiful here. The lake to the north looks so majestic. I can hardly wait to see it snow covered. I'm going to love it here.
October 14
Pennsylvania is definitely the most beautiful place on earth. There are so many experiences we never had down south. The leaves have turned all the colors and shades of red and orange. Went for a ride through Valley Forge Park and saw some deer. They are so graceful. Certainly they are the most wonderful animals on earth. This must be paradise, I LOVE IT HERE.
November 10
Deer season will start soon. I can't imagine anyone wanting to kill such a gorgeous animal, hope it will snow soon. I love it here. Those red and orange leaves have covered my yard. Looks like a magnificent multi-colored carpet. HOW BEAUTIFUL. Raking and cleaning up the yard will be an opportunity for invigorating exercise in the cool crisp air.
November 15
Ah, more leaves and more exercise.
November 18
Jesus, still more leaves. Guess it's best to wait until they've all fallen before I rake again.
November 25
Finally, all of the trees lost their leaves and today's final raking; it's over for this season. Chiropractor suggested I use a lawn maintenance service next year. Only four blisters became infected. Should probably remember to use gloves.
November 30
What the f--k? Where did all of those leaves come from? A little wind last night and the lawn is covered again. Oh well, they'll just have to wait until spring. Wonder if we'll get a white Christmas. We've never seen that in Florida.
December 12
It snowed last night, FINALLY. Woke up to find everything blanketed in white. It looks like a postcard. We went outside and cleaned the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. Had a snowball fight (I won) and when the snowplow came by and we had to shovel the end of the driveway again. What a beautiful place. I Love PA.
December 14
More snow last night, I love it. The snowplow did his trick to the driveway again. I Love it here.
December 19
More snow again last night. Can't get out of the driveway to get to work. I'm exhausted from shoveling. F---ing snowplow.
December 22
More of that white sh-t fell again last night. As if dealing with the leaves weren't bad enough, now I've got blisters all over my hands from shoveling, must remember to wear gloves. I think the snowplow hides around the corner and waits until I'm finished shoveling the driveway. The a--hole.
December 25. Merry Christmas.
More frigging snow. If I ever get my hands on that son-of-a-bitch who drives the snowplow I swear I'll kill the bastard. Don't know why they don't use more salt on the roads to melt the f---ing ice.
December 27
More white sh-t last night. Have been inside for three days except for shoveling out the driveway after that plow goes through every time. F---ing gloves got wet and then froze on my hands. Doctor said it was just a mild case of frostbite, disfiguration is probably only temporary. Can't go anywhere, car is stuck in a mountain of white sh-t. The weatherman says to expect another 10 inches of the sh-t tonight. Do you know how many shovels full of snow 10 inches is?
December 28
The f---ing weatherman was wrong. We got 34 inches of that white sh-t. At this rate it won't melt 'till summer. The plow got stuck up the road and the bastard came to the door and asked to borrow a shovel. After I told him I'd already broken six of them shoveling all the sh-t he pushed into the driveway, I broke my last one on his f---ing head.
January 4
Finally got out of the house today. Went to the store to get food and on the way back I hit a damned deer that ran in front of my car. Did about $3000 damage. F---ing beast should be killed. Wish the hunters had killed them all last November.
January 12
More bloody snow. I can't get out of the house at all. Plow doesn't come any more.
January 22
Even more snow piled on the remains of the last lot. Down to the last three cans of beans. Tree loaded with frozen show and ice fell on the house and put a hole in the roof.
January 29
Power went out in the area. My generator ran out of gas and there's no way to get any as all the gas stations are out of power too. Sitting in front of a kerosene heater and using it to heat beans on top. $450 of food in the freezer just had to get thrown out into the yard. At least the raccoons will eat well.
February 1
Snow, rain, sleet, freezing rain. Fell over in the yard and broke my elbow. No mail or paper. Trash people won't come and I'm down to the last couple of gallons of heating oil. My ex-friend in Forida phoned to say how nice it was on the beach today. If she ever comes up here I'll kill her.
February 2 to April 1
Freeze, thaw, snow, rain, sleet, hailstones, freezing rain. Al Gore on TV saying the second record cold winter and snowfall are proof of global warming.
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May 3
Took the car to the garage in town. The thing is rusting out from all the f---ing salt they put all over the roads.
May 10
Moved to The Villages in Florida. I can't imagine why anyone in their right mind would ever live in that God-forsaken state of Pennsylvania.
